Xmas Wrapping

Not that long ago in a holiday season not that far away there was myself in a hospital bed lying there
under surveillance by chuck norris the nurse, who insisted i be cuffed to the bed since the straps were
not holding me plus i removed all my hook ups and went for a smoke with a very cute nurse at 4a.m.
so now im guessing you would want a back story
i will give the short of it as always since im’ not proud but to me it is much like the time i convinced
someone a guy in new orleans that i was going to sacrifice a goat at midnight for new years to the pagan
god of redheads..it happened comical or not
after the usual row in work in which i told my boss/friend to basically go choke
i hit the cold december street in a more fierce bad way even for myself,dropped 20 bucks for beer
headed back to my coffin apartment and started to clean it top to bottom
random songs became songs on repeat
numb and content
pulling the bottle of klonopin that i had stashed a day or two beforehand they became the cheerful pill
shot to go with cheap beer coma that was setting in
i went through the routine as would most people,i buzzed my hair in the normal way made plans to have a
few with my upstairs friend
out comes the other friendly bottle of melatonin to shake hands with the other pills
from the long hot bath fresh and clean
over the counter pain relief sleeping aid joins the game
this whole while avoiding my roommates knocking back beers since i had a fridge full
i stumbled to the next building to see a my friend now ingesting hand fulls of the chex mix of pills i had
in my pocket
my normal drunken self show up at his door with my normal drunken popeye look except during our
conversation and beer i was inhaling good chunks from hip pocket pharmacy
the even blackness started with show up as they caught on to my scheme
i knew it was time to go home
i fell up the hill and stairs to my place
the feeling i remember well with who and what that crossed my mind
looking in the mirror,was this a way to solve anything?
no its’ just a story
my suggestion


I Didn’t Shoot My Eye Out

Its’ an old story but true ,i was looking for the original post being reminded by someone i adore but alas its’ much more fun to rehash miserable holiday tales…

Every year for the holidays we would visit what was left of our family on my fathers’ side of course
since there was nothing but stories left of my mothers
they lived in a very nice neighborhood that hated me and i also hated it i was more likely to be involved in a yuletide scrap whilst trying to sneak a smoke down the street away from the elders eyes(yes thats’ how young i was)
my cousin threw my name around like i was mike tyson so that didnt’ help my case much but also there was quite the feud between this place of glory homes and my neck of the gutter,all these little pricks knew who i was so there was not much chance to hide more so when people are announcing my visit like the baby J.C
there was no love lost between myself and the family
i was the wrong side of the track donkey and the butt of the jokes so i loved xmas time here although it was done with love but when all the jokes are the same it doesnt’ take a 15 year old to figure out how they really felt about me not cordially embracing their way of life or how long they cooked the pasta sauce
as i got older they got better towards me even if its’ another story
this was saturday the 23rd so all i wanted to do was get the abuse over with and back to the neighborhood for drinks just like any young hooligan of 15 wants no?
i labored biting my tongue all day dodging the depressing bullshit
then hit the block running
got to the corner and it was empty
checked out both parks and alleys but no one to be found
yes, all i needed was a scrawny xmas tree i felt like the daft kid in the after school specials looking around for friends when it was two days before the holiday they were off doing what families do
so i did what any feeling sorry for himself young man would do , i hit the liquor store
$8.50 i had 4 bottles of the worst MD20/20 mad dog flavor known to man ..the yellow lighting creek with a 40.0z to wash it down i headed to the park to sit alone and wait for anyone to come strolling along
sat there i did listening to horrid cackling of cheery carols from other houses
im’ not even sure how long i was there ,i just remember being at the end of my beer half asleep singing the pogues to myself
when he walked into the park just as drunk as i was carrying a full bottle of johnny walker
laughing his head off at the state i was in kicking my feet to wake me up like a cop
john was good for that
the bottle was passed back and forth
cursing every bleeding thing you can think of that goes along with the holidays
bottle was finished
the sun was not sure if it wanted to get out of bed
the boys from the NYPD were not at all singing
they sent us home
john still knows the words to Fairytale Of NY
we both really cannot stand fucking xmas
all except for the that song

Old Sessions 2003-12-07 16:23:00

When you get back to the bottom you go back to the top…
Laughing at a dream that used to be instilled realities
of a park bench
Mad Dog Lighting Creek
xmas carols full blast from open windows and lonely voices
fairytale of NY on the air
snow covering blacktop painted with yesterdays glass filled laughter
only to shine inbetween the nights snow light
against the houses lit up in ceremony for the gathering of jackyls
as he comes barreling through the gate with our old friend johnny walker
laughing at the sight
just because he can …

Santas’ Seven Samurai

Dear Santa,
Give me more Depalma and less Fellini
with a lot of Kurosawa and John Hughes
at least the good hearted and the noble sort of win in the end…
am i just being concrete and selfish again?
i think i might be
your entire being is an iconic falsehood fed to children since the dawn of time
so maybe i can be a little selfish for the surrounding good
plus i know my uncle peter shot you on my grandmothers street when i was 6
stole your boots to show us since he had already hidden the body